and as one of the longest days ever unwinds, i have but simple thoughts.

i bring my own grief. i have no excuses.

thank you for loving me regardless.

Auto response from LolaAnn816: and when the 5lb jar of change was full, a little light would go off and id know it was Cargo Pant Day, and the land would rejoice. and id just throw the change in my pockets and buy a car alarm, not the whole car just the alarm and id tie it to my chest and go walking and then the first homeless man that said 'hey man you got some change' the alarm would go off and the lights would go off and itd be like DINGDINGDING you just hit the JACKPOT and id start throwing the change at him and itd hurt but he wouldnt care bec he WON and when its Cargo Pant Day everybody wins
ok then.

so today was my first day as a hardcore babysitter(although it was more of a sneak preview since i was only there for about 3 hours). their mom referred to me as a nanny. granted, the kids aren't babies, & since i will be with them everyday, i suppose that this term is more appropriate... but no. ha, nanny just sounds to close to nana aka being old. while yes, many have told me that i'll be an awesome old lady, an early start is uneccessary.

i got to go swimming though, & that was cool. it struck me that this will be exercise for me. which is awesome. gotta keep rockin' those 2 pieces so that i can be the envy of the beach moms, ha. my aunt was there as well, which was pleasant. it will be nice to get to see folks more often.

ooh, so it just came to my attention that terror squad has an album out with the same name as me blog. dunno who they are...but fat joe is on tv now with them, & a small child just said, "yo true story," with attitude. ooh baby.

i'm in a weird sort of mood today. yesterday, i was like hmm, i have no emotions towards boys, now today i'm like awh, boys again. screw u. i don't even have a boy to be getting fickle about. although grandma thought that my mom said that i had a bf i didn't tell her about, so she came in and hit me in the face.
well, not really hit.
more like tapped my nose.
but still.

either way, i feel fickle about a lot of things. & yes ev, i do recall when u deleted ur old blog to be more pleasant so STOP. not everything needs to be analyzed. smell some flowers, drink some coffee, enjoy ur days of summer. u won't find those in ic.

mtv's summer ads suck btw. summer beach house my ass. so do the mcdonalds ads. i ain't lovin' squat. the identity theft commercials from citibank though, those warrant praise. *praise praise... praise*

so ya know what i've got a beef with? ppl making infos & away messages to quote themselves being witty. especially when the party they're conversiing with only says 'lolol' or something incompetent like that. u all know what im' talking about, & it's just unnecessary. i'm sure that i've posted convos where both parties have had amusing things said on their part before, and we all have our moments, but to make ur info a look at me fest? please kiddies. go get a hug from mommy, & perhaps check to see if there are popsicles in the fridge while ur at it.

ps i found a fun new site called http://toothpastefordinner.com cartoons & shiz. observe:

U2

I have climbed the highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Only to be with you.

I have run, I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls
These city walls
Only to be with you.

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.

I have kissed honey lips
Felt the healing in her fingertips
It burned like fire
This burning desire

I have spoke with the tongue of angels
I have held the hand of a devil
It was warm in the night
I was cold as a stone.

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.

I believe in the Kingdom Come
Then all the colours will bleed into one
Bleed into one.
But yes, I'm still running.

You broke the bonds
And you loosed the chains
Carried the cross of my shame
Oh my shame, you know I believe it.

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.

ok, sooo over 3200 visits, yet none of u fuckers leave me comments? what up with that?

ps i do believe such harsh terminology was warranted. as for the children- ear muffs


Who's Your Movie Sidekick? Find out @ She's Crafty
how charming. my sidekick is a gay heterosexual. fanciful indeed.

i toyed with purchasing modest mouse today, but then i did not. mistake?


how to not love this pic. em, me, & kim at some random circles party earlier in the semester. awh, love my girls.
hope everyone's summers r shaping out a-ok

I choose Vodka. And Chaka Khan. -bridget jones

so today i did a whole lotta nothin'. woo woo! it was one of my ignore everyone days. it strikes me that most ppl probably don't even know that i behave this way. cuz hey, if i'm ignoring u, then u don't see it. i watched 'from justin to kelly' which yes, is as amazingly craptastic as it was made out to be. kelly has a rather large ass, so rock on to her. justin, however... i suppose one would have to really think he was a cutie to make it through the film without laughing at that which is not to be funny. it's just so horrid, written by fuller's sister. those poor kids had no choice but to be humiliated.

rAmcalleY: how have you been?
noel762: pondering if my breasts r shrinking
rAmcalleY: oh no!
rAmcalleY: why would they do such a thing?
noel762: cuz if i lose any weight, it seems to come straight from there
rAmcalleY: well
rAmcalleY: there's a can of crisco in your kitchen cupboard with your name on it!
noel762: ooh baby
rAmcalleY: fatten those breasts up baby
noel762: at first i thought u meant to massage them with
noel762: but now i've got ya
rAmcalleY: LOL
noel762: either way works, i'm sure
rAmcalleY: try them both haha
noel762: i'll keep that in mind

i also spent some quality time trying to get a scanner working on this thing. there were no pictures which i had a burning to desire to scan. but alas, sharing is always fun... as long as there is no chocolate involved.


i very much fancy this haircut. just thought i'd share.
see how fun it can be! whoah buddy!

oy, so i don't so much like boys lately. i'm not sure if it's just because i haven't been around them much or what. i suck at being a girl alright.

& in other news... the new job starts in a wk. ay, crazy world.

ahh heck, here's a quiz.

Which Sex and the City Player Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty
tbs doesnt get enough props. rock on tbs, rock on. & yay, apparently ppl like me even if i am a loon. we'll see if they still feel that way if i lay off the crisco...
peace my lovelies

Are You a Ho? Find out @ She's Crafty
awh, so not only do i have mariah carey breasts, but ho-ness as well. good to know.

went to a tea party yesterday with the girls. it was cute. seems like a great place to have a bridal shower. though ps, i told my mom that no man is going to marry me cuz i mess up household chores. i got water allover trying to dry dishes (ironically enough). if only i had a massive rack like jessica simpson. why then, my domestication could do no wrong.

ha, long live the sexist. i could do just that & my husband would just be like awh, baby...

jazmin... that post was insane. i still wish i were born into a bilingual family though. that's a great & priceless skill alright.

happy father's day/longest day of the year/last day of spring for 2004

so can someone tell me what is up with the ghetto white tshirt? it's like if ya wanna be thug, ya gotta rock the extra long white tee. it's not oversized per se, oh no. just insanely, & what i find to be unecessarily, long. what is the benefit of this? it covers the boxers which one would surely otherwise be exposing, so i suppose for this, a mother can be proud. but oh hark! what if danger were to suddenly erupt? how would one attain one's "piece" in a timely manner with all that cotton befuddling the way? g's, i am at a loss alright. i am at a loss.
& i'm also wondering if u r familiar with this phenomenon. them crazy kids.

You're addicted to.....

Nothing!
Your addicted to nothing at all? Well..... ok I
guess thats a good thing but come on just think
of the possibilities!


What are you addicted to? (pics!)
brought to you by Quizilla
what a bland quiz result. even chappelle is confused by it all.

oh sigh. must be cuz "sexy ladies" wasn't an option.

so i had some really whacked out dream last night. tell u about it? why surely!

i was in a dance recital with 3 other girls, i have no idea why. one of the girls made up the dance, & katie was in it too. well she got nervous right as we were going on stage, & peed her pants. yes that's right. i had a dream in which katie peed her pants. we had these leotards & flowy dance skirts on, & since she was standing at the time, no one really noticed that it happened. so blah blah blah, we're dancing, & we have to lie on the floor at one point. and oh sigh, sorry for the graphic nature, but when i lay down, i get all wet. can't imagine why :/ oof. so i'm like oy vey, so i make it as if i'm still dancing & go off stage to try & think of what i should do. so the dance is almost done, & then this guy appears on the other side of the stage, backstage. he's very agent esque, eating a sandwich, & he's all what happened?! & the girl who choreographed the dance, who mind u, is still on stage, says that I got scared & peed MY pants. so i come back out to strike a final pose, wet spot & all, & the girl is all huffy, & everyone is looking at me like i ruined whatever this big opportunity was. so i tell the audience, just so u know, I didn't pee my pants. but i didn't want to tell them that it was katie, cuz ya know, we're sbx. & they were like yeah, we know, get off the stage. but i tell them that they must imagine how i feel, & they nod sympathetically as good choruses in theatrical works should do.
so then i run into katie off stage, & she's all glassy eyed & seems to have no idea what's going on, somewhat moving in slow motion. then suddenly walter calls her, on her nonexistant cell phone of course, & tells her that we should come to the general store cuz he & some others are "chillin'". ha, which for whatever reason this store he claims to be at is in my hometown, & katie was like come on, let's walk, still somewhat incoherant. i pointed out that this was hundreds of miles, & she changed her mind.
so then suddenly i realize that i have on this i was in the recital sort of tshirt on, so oh heck, i can go watch the show. so way in the back i see rachel & meghan. they said that they knew i didn't pee. rachel said, "i like the way u looked like u loved everything."

and there u go. the moral of the story? don't wear a new top hat in the rain.



ps- i figured out how to post some of my own pictures. oh gasp! here's an old one, but still HOT. ha...

me & lucia... circa de halloween

good times yo

lauryn on having kids-
I want to dress them and name them and play with them and stuff.
awh, someone never bought that girl a doll house. ha.

so according to the wonders of whitepages.com, someone in the 14th floor of the west tower gave me a ring a ling today. this confuses me. was it you?

letterman's top 10 reasons john kerry is really running for president. number 6: get elected, eat a ton of waffles, become the fattest president.
vote waffles! everyone knows that breakfast is important.

i enjoy tbs. 'when harry met sally' has been on often lately. quality film, but 2 thoughts-
1- billy crystal looks weird with hair
2- he seems like he'd be an aloof bf... but at the same time, i can't imagine wanting to go out with him
also, harry connick jr does the music for the film... ha, ooh baby.

Harry: You realize of course that we could never be friends.
Sally: Why not?
H: What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
S: That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.
H: No you don't.
S: Yes I do.
H: No you don't.
S: Yes I do.
H: You only think you do.
S: You say I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
H: No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.
S: They do not.
H: Do too.
S: They do not.
H: Do too.
S: How do you know?
H: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
S: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
H: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.
S: What if THEY don't want to have sex with YOU?
H: Doesn't matter because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.
S: Well, I guess we're not going to be friends then.
H: I guess not.
S: That's too bad. You were the only person I knew in New York.
oh boys... sigh. ha, that's probably true. leave it to the movies.

Harry: You know, I have a theory that hieroglyphics are just an ancient comic strip about a character named Sphinxy.

i want to see saved! but alas, it's not playing around here. psha. what up with that mandy? what up?

ThatsASin: drunken god punching somebody repeatedly is always comedy


if not for the rising counter, i'd seriously wonder if anyone still reads this thing. oh sigh, where are the comments? where is the love?

hanson, black eyed peas, justin timberlake, & i would all like to know.

so i was reading a thread on advice to college freshmen on myspace.com. granted, freshmen yr has come & gone, but i feel that some of them serve true & have purpose nonetheless.

-venture out... if you are curious, then experiment. don't leave the flames of temptation undoused unless there is a really good reason.

-know as many people as possible. make acquaintances. when people are drunk and dt, if you remember their name and shoot the breeze, they act like you're their best friend. even if you only talk to them at parties, they do the same with you and you meet people through them, learn things and look more popular. you want to do this if you're the type of person who wants to walk into a bar alone and have it be like cheers, where everybody knows your name and wants to talk to you.-ha, yeah say hi friends

and then this one is just funny
-One of my uncles advised me to do drugs in college instead of drinking beer, because "beer will make you get fat. With drugs, you lose weight!" I still don't know if he was joking or not, and now I understand why my parents told me never to listen to him.

today at work, a small asian girl peed her pants as she waited with her mother in line. "i gotta go, mommy! i gotta, i gotta go!" she cried. but then alas, no longer than 10 seconds later, she could not hold it.

oh ev, did u do this as a wee one? hope u carried spare pants.

2 fabulously gay men entered my work around 20:15 this evening. bleach blond side parted hair, polo shirts (collars up, of course), knit sweaters over their shoulders, khaki shorts, & wads of cash to boot. oh yes, fabulous indeed. they bought a bunch of pillows & a collage picture frame.

...slumber party TONIGHT!!

-You totally ripped off my Malibu Barbie idea!
-Nuh-uh, I'm Disco Barbie! (does a beegees inspired funkafied diddy)
ha, oh what's not to love...

oxidation. why is it bad? i'm not a science person. i keep reading this term on things & i don't know what it's referring to. help a brother out, foo(s).

i watched high fidelity today:
Sometimes I got so bored of trying to touch her breast that I would try to touch her between her legs. It was like trying to borrow a dollar, getting turned down, and asking for 50 grand instead.
oh the minds of boys. this analogy amused me.

hurrah hurrah. not having to get up 'early' for work any day this wk has got me messed up again. i had been doing a splendid job at the 1:30 bed thing... but no man. alas, i sucketh uno tiempo moreth... my alarm clock is very much the 'suggested time to rise', not so much the 'i embrace u as a serious appliance which aids in my well being time to rise' as it should be. oh bother. oh bother indeed.


You're a Speak & Spell!! You nerd, you. Just
because you were disguised as a toy doesn't
mean you weren't educational, you sneaky
bastard.


What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
ooh, well how terribly smarmy of me...

Ksherwi: i miss you, daughter dana!
awh, i heart & miss mom as well

so how gross is this- i made 50 cents more an hr at vicky's sorting underwear all day than i do at my real job. psha. not cool craft store, not cool.

june 1st, what the h? back in grammar school, june really meant something... now i'm like hot damn the summer is long

((i wish i could teleport to australia))