i just looked at a book & almost felt inspired to read it... ha! yeah, ok...

In California, a speech teacher is in a lot of trouble for encouraging her students to oppose the war with Iraq. The principal was furious and said telling kids to oppose the war is the French teacher's job. -Conan O'Brien... oh conan. u tickle me plenty alright

so... work today. bleh as usual. a guy came in who looked totally like doogie houser. poor kid. i also had some guy come in & ask me i'm a professional artist. maybe u can help me out. someone asked me to do an illustration for them. what's an illustration? i was seriously wondering if the guy was joking or not. but as i explained what an illustrator does, he was like oh oh i see... so it's like the story with pictures then? he proceeded to ask me if we had any books on what illustrating is. when i told him no, he asked if perhaps barnes & noble did. aiesh. i felt like telling him to go to the library & open any children's book. who doesn't know this? i literally learned it in kindergarten... & a professional artist? this still perplexes me

i'm finally getting my haircut on tuesday =)

grandma almost set the house on fire *again* today. yeah grandma. rock on.

i'm trying to find the reason behind all the emails i have yet to delete. oh sweet blog, take them away. here's the first of the somewhat amusing banter:

THINGS ONLY A MOM CAN TEACH

1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION..."Just wait until
we get home."

2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING...."You are going to
get it when we get home!"

3. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE..."What were you
thinking? Answer me when I talk to you ...Don't talk back to
me!"

4. My Mother taught me LOGIC..."If you fall out of that swing
and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

5. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE..."If you don't stop
crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

6. My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD..."If you don't pass
your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

7. My Mother taught me ESP..."Put your sweater on; don't you
think I know when you're cold?"

8. My Mother taught me HUMOR..."When that lawn mower cuts off
your toes, don't come running to me."

9. My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT..."If you don't
eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

10. My Mother taught me about SEX...."How do you think you got
here?"

11. My Mother taught me about GENETICS..."You're just like your
father."

12. My Mother taught me about my ROOTS..."Do you think you were
born? In a barn?"

13. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE..."When you get to
be my age, you will understand.

14. And my all time favorite... JUSTICE..."One day you'll have
kids, and I hope they turn out just like you....Then you'll see
what it's like."

oh yes, i see so many moms at my work each day. it's amazing how quickly a smile can turn into DAMMIT JAMIE YOU'RE GONNA DRIVE ME CRAZY TODAY!! oh joy. & yet i still want to have zee babies. this is why my friends think i'm insane. but oh shut up, u all will. and- u'll like it ...dammit.

here's another random bit of chewy fun:

1-800-PSYCH

Hello, Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.

If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.

If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are depressed, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.

alright, i guess that's enough. don't wanna go on overkill ya know.

yeah, so my mom is currently pacing about mumbling about tv remote controls. when i find em, i'm gonna hide every single one of them. i'm gonna hide em. i'm gonna hide every single one. -she threatens. yeaaa... see i don't get how this helps anyone do anything. remote controls keep u from getting up. they let u b an american by making it easier for u to get what u want simply by sitting on ur ass. way to go mom, way to screw the system. ...and wth is she gonna do with them anyway? i don't understand blog, i just don't understand

hmm... i haven't much else to share. but rest assured cuz boy oh boy do u have random ramblings to look forward to... ooh baby baby ;)